The Incidents of Eugene Mirman

I will be in Copenhagen from December 9th to the 19th covering the climate change conference (in a charmingly unruly, balls-out way) for Grist.org. Here’s a little promo video I made:

I’m very much looking forward to this trip. I’ve been reading and listening to countless things about climate change and Denmark. For instance, did you know that Denmark is so concerned with global warming, they tip-toe everywhere, so they don’t scare their trees from absorbing carbon dioxide? Wow! That is amazing. Okay. Bye bye for now.

Here’s a review of my new album in Blurt Magazine. It got eight stars, which I’m assuming is out of 10, but maybe it is out of 7 (which would be amazing) or out of 4302 (less impressive).

It began with seeing a few posters at bus stops around NY: Steven Seagal is about to have a TV show on A&E where he is a deputy sheriff in the south (near New Orleans I think). For those who don’t know, Steven Seagal is a celebrated marksman and a 7th-degree black belt in Slappity-Slap-kido (a form of Aikido that involves some magic and a lot of harsh slapping and dodging). Here’s a preview for his show:

One of my favorite lines, “I’ve studied martial arts for most of my life, so I have a lot of confidence in myself, but I really worry about my own team members sometimes. So, today I’m going to teach these boys some new tricks.” Unlike most policemen, Steven is so confident in his martial arts training, he’ll brazenly approach armed men — but he’s worried that his team might not have that same unnerving confidence (so he’s going to teach them how to flip tiny Asian men). I think he’s confusing himself with Batman.

As far as I can tell, this show is mostly Steven Seagal driving around, acting unreasonably cocky, and arresting slightly inebriated, somewhat-pleased-to-meet-him poor people. I don’t mean to make fun of him, considering from this short clip he was one of the three lead detectives who stopped a man from doing donuts in a parking lot and then sort of helped wrestle him out of the car, or not, can’t tell from the quick cutting.

In conclusion, here’s a Steven Seagal song that shines a light on the clash between religions (he suspiciously leaves out Wickens and Protestants?). I can say with certainty that Steven thinks violence is a bad way to solve religious conflicts. However, with his career as proof, he does think it’s a good way to stop corporate environmental abuse, corrupt cops, and Eric Bogosian.

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The lyrics, for those who don’t have time to listen to the whole song:

Want to read a very positive review of my new record? It’s as easy as clicking on the word superfucktastic!

Also, the Village Voice wrote a nice thing about me for their Best of 2009 issue (I am listed as NY’s best ice cream parlor!!!!! — not true, sorry).

Click the words right here including foodledoodle to read it.

Would you like to hear a great cover? Press play below! Plus this song proves that Scientology doesn’t negatively affect your singing or ability to cover the Velvet Underground. In fact, it probably takes a Level 12 Thetan to do such a good job. Anyway, enjoy:

Record Club: Velvet Underground & Nico ‘Sunday Morning’ from Beck Hansen on Vimeo.

I’m guest editor of Magnet Magazine this week. Every day they will run two things I wrote about things I like. Here’s a link:

http://www.magnetmagazine.com/category/guest-editor/

Here’s a little blurb from the Boston Globe on my CD release party at PA’s Lounge in Somerville. They forgot to mention that I had ice cream cake from Carvel, but that’s okay:

My new album, God Is a Twelve-Year-Old Boy With Asperger’s , is out today! Go buy it, please! I’d like to be 200 on the Billboard charts this week! We can do it (maybe, since CD sales are WAY down!)

You can get it from Sub Pop, Amazon, iTunes or wherever CDs are still sold (at least two other places I bet).

Also, here is what was intended to be the last track on the album written by John Wesley Harding and me (kind of):

12 Delta Delta Delta (Nothing Rhymes With Delta)

Tonight at PA’s Lounge in Somerville, MA
CD Release Party + Show!
18+, $10, Doors 8:30, show at 9.
With Eugene Mirman and friends.

Here’s an interview I did recently about dating and whatnot with Nerve.com. Enjoy!

http://advice.nerve.com/2009/09/18/sex-advice-from-eugene-mirman/

Last year myself and a few friends put on a slightly ridiculous comedy festival in Brooklyn. We had fun so we’re doing it again. Here’s what we have so far. It’ll probably change a little bit. Also, we’ll soon add a late night show — The Perfect Storm Screen’s The Perfect Storm – Gloucester’s #1 trance band screens Gloucester’s #1 movie experience.

1. Eugene Mirman Comedy Festival Opening night party!
Sponsored by Planet Funny! “A made up comedy channel”
With performances by Kristen Schaal, Pete Holmes, Jon Benjamin + Sal Lupo, Eugene Mirman and more!
Plus videos from: Leo Allen, Tim and Eric, Max Silvestri and many more!
Featuring a whole roast pig and a cardboard VIP room.
+ Special musical guest. And big after party.
Date: Thursday, Sept 17th
Time: 8p
Venue: Bell House
Ticket Price: $20

2. Show: Daniel Kitson
Date: Friday, September 18th
Time: Door: 730, Show: 8
Venue: Union Hall
Ticket Price: $12

3. Show: Invite Them Up
Hosted by: Bobby Tisdale with Eugene Mirman, Todd Barry, Reggie Watts, John Hodgman and special guests.
Date: Friday, September 18th
Time: Doors: 8:30p, Show: 9p
Venue: Bell House
Ticket Price: $15

4. Show: Daniel Kitson
Date: Saturday, September 19th
Time: Door: 630, Show: 7p
Venue: Union Hall
Ticket Price: $12

5. Show: I’ll Be Famous in 5 Years (or a Copywriter / Audience Coordinator)
With Hannibal Buress, Kumail Nanjiani, Brent Sullivan, Patrick Borelli and more.
Date: Saturday, September 19th
Time: Doors: 6p, Show: 630p
Venue: Bell House
Ticket Price: $10

6. Show: The Comedians of Law and Order
What is this show? Basically, it’s comedians who we like who’ve been on at least one of the 9 different Law and Orders, including Zak Orth, AD Miles, Jim Gaffigan and special guests.
Date: Saturday, September 19th
Time: Doors: 830p, Show: 9p
Venue: Bell House
Ticket Price: $15

7. Panel: Why Talented People Create Terrible Shows
Eric Slovin and Leo Allen host a panel of comedians, executives and industry people discussing why so many talented people make such terrible shows. With Bret Gelman, Sam Seder and more.
Date: Sunday, September 20th
Time: Doors at 3p, Show at 3:30p
Venue: Bell House
Ticket Price: $7

8. Show: Ten Drink Minimum: Stories Leading to Sobriety
Hosted by: Marc Maron with Michael Showalter, John Mulaney, Brett Gelman, Tony V and special guest
Date: Sunday, September 20th
Time: Doors: 6p, Show at 6:30p
Venue: Bell House
Ticket Price: $15 (one drink included)

9. Event: Witty Cartoons for Snobs!
Top cartoonists from The New Yorker and other crappier publications battle it out in a no-holds-barred cartoon-off with cartoons based on audience suggestions. Plus a surprise musical guest.
Date: Sunday, September 20th
Time: Doors: 5:30p, Show: 6p
Venue: Union Hall
Ticket Price: $10

10. Show: Tearing the Veil of Maya (and closing night party)
With: Eugene Mirman, Michael Showalter, Daniel Kitson, John Mulaney and special guests.
Time: Doors: 830p, Show at 9p
Venue: Bell House
Ticket Price: $15